A Diabetic’s Idea of a Joke

Here is a list of some funny things that have happened to me. These are the kind of things that any “normal” person wouldn’t laugh at.

1.  My grandfather thought he could give me shots because he has a diabetic cat. I had a huge bruise after he stuck the needle in my arm. I haven’t let him give me a shot since.

2.  When my Tae Kwon Do teacher found out that I had Diabetes, he patted my arm and said, “Don’t worry. It happens to all of us.”

3.  A week after I was diagnosed with Diabetes a friend sent me candy to make me feel better. It was traumatizing after I had just found out that I might never be able to have sugar again. It doesn’t matter now, as I would have just eaten it, but at the time my mom laughed and I cried.

4.  My mother gave my grandfather strict instructions to go the store, and get some diet soda for Claire. Let’s repeat that. Diet. He came back with regular sodas that were all caffeine free. He thought that I couldn’t have caffeine.

Diabetic Jumping Rope5.  When I was first diagnosed with Diabetes my parents were terrified of giving me insulin when I was high. So whenever I was 300 they sent me outside to jump with a jumprope.

6.  I forget my Diabetes kit in the most random places: Tae Kwon Do, in a Mexican restaurant, etc. They all end with me running to that place as fast as I can or my parents driving me there.

7.  I took a shower and couldn’t find my pump to reconnect. The whole family searched the entire house, until I realized that it was just in the bathroom.

8.  I jumped into the pool with my pump on without realizing it. Then my mom looked down and I got out real quick. Luckily it was water proof.

9.  My hands were full of things and my brother was teasing me. Instead of throwing a towel or something at him I throw my insulin pump. It survived the encounter, and it was only about a foot long toss. My brother ducked.

10.  My pump tubing caught on the door knob and I tripped. I had bruises for the next two weeks.

Sincerely,

Claire Montgomery
Type 1 Diabetic, Diabetic Teenage Blogger, Odd Event Attracter

5 thoughts on “A Diabetic’s Idea of a Joke

  1. Brad

    These crack me up. The one when your Grandfather stopped listening to us trying to teach him how to give you an injection was hilarious. “No! I know how to do this…my CAT has diabetes!” Then a huge bruise.

    Funny stuff. Nicely written. You rule!

  2. Brad

    How ’bout the time you were at camp and they made you special “sugar free” pudding — which had a nearly equal amount of carbs as non sugar free.

    Or the time we came home from the Diabetes Center for the first time — at meal time, and were hyped up about testing and needles and insulin and your little brother and sister cried because we were so weird about it.

  3. Granddad

    Giving a cat two injections a day doesn’t qualify me to be a certified injection tech? Oh well, i’ll have to practice more on the cat…..sorry Claire, didn’t mean to hurt you…love you Granddad….

  4. Pingback: Luke Skywalker Recently Diagnosed With Diabetes | Thoughts on Life with Diabetes

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